25 January 2002

My Sister

All 3 of my children have birthdays in January. These dates make me so sad. I have missed far too many of their birthdays, missed so much, My beloved Mum died 5 months after I came to prison. My 3 Grandchildren have been born - it really hurts.

My sister died...

I always believed she would eventually tell me why she lied:
Why on the day after I discovered Aunty's body - did you tell the police I would not let you visit Aunty! How could you lie like that? Was that said merely to cover up your problem with alcohol? Did you worry about criticism because you hardly ever visited Aunty or Mum? That is the only reason I feel?

But Ann, there was no need for you to say such things - I was so hurt - but kept telling myself that one day you would speak out and tell the truth - about the money and other things. But that can't happen now? I know you were ill - but I also think you were mentally ill. It was a wasted life. Sadly, I think the police "used" you - knowing your state of mind


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